Speaker 1: 0:03

Hey there, welcome to the Hot Mess Mom Health Podcast. Do you wish you could find a sustainable way to get healthy and not feel overwhelmed in the process? Do you find yourself up late at night scouring Pinterest for meal prep ideas and quick workouts? Do you wake up with big, ambitious goals only to feel stressed out and disappointed when you fall back in your old habits? Drive through the Chick-fil-A drive-through for the second time this week, all while the fresh produce you just bought goes bad? I'm Rebecca.

Speaker 1: 0:31

I too am a working mom of two littles and self-proclaimed hot mess mom. All my life I've struggled with trying to maintain a healthy weight and feel good in my skin. I could add yoyo diet or to my resume. After I packed on 50 plus pounds with two pregnancies, I decided to change for good. I wanted to stop obsessing about food, stay consistent and set a good, healthy example for my kids, but I kept telling myself that I didn't have the time, the energy or accountability to stay on track, until I changed my mindset and created one healthy habit at a time. In this podcast, you will find simple, actionable steps that you can create a healthy lifestyle and get relief from the overwhelm. Spread that dry shampoo, grab your iced coffee, turn up the volume and let's get healthy.

Speaker 1: 1:17

Hey there, happy Monday and welcome back to another episode of Hot Mess Mom Health. I hope everyone out there is looking forward to an amazing week. We are kicking off Monday here. We are in March and it's just kind of crazy. My daughter is about to turn five years old and just with the spring and all the craziness that's going on in life, it just seems hard to believe that we're in March. I know I probably say that every week, but I just feel like time is flying. It's kind of scary. I guess it's the kind of thing that happens when you get older that time just seems to go faster and faster, which kind of stinks, but I guess it is what it is.

Speaker 1: 1:54

Today, on Hot Mess Mom Health, what I wanted to do is something that I've been working on for a while behind the scenes. It's something that's going to be, I think, a cornerstone to my brand and Hot Mess Mom Health, to my coaching, to everything that I do from here on out. The reason why I've been working hard and putting this together is because, on this journey that we are all on, it is just that it is a journey. There is not a one-size-fits-all approach. There is not a final destination, if you will.

Speaker 1: 2:26

Health is a constant thing that we are all working to try to do our best to evolve, to try to figure out what works for us and our uniqueness, everything that we have personally within ourselves. Like I say a lot on this podcast, not everything's going to work for you. What's working for Aunt Sally is not necessarily going to work for you. Yes, there are some commonalities about a health goal, but I think a lot of times people feel lost because they either don't know why they can't get past where they are or they can't get started. I've been working really hard, like I said, behind the scenes. I've done interviews with a bunch of women. I've started health coaching some people. I've been picking apart all these things along with analyzing my own health journey throughout the course of 20, 30 years and realizing all of my struggles and things that I'm still going through.

Speaker 1: 3:16

This is a journey we are all together. I put this together to, in some ways, let you know that what you're feeling, what you're going through, is okay, it's normal and kind of help you figure out what the action steps are and what the movements are that you can make to get out of wherever you are if you feel stuck there. I'm hoping that this validates your feelings, lets you know that you're not alone and helps you realize that, thank you, you're only a couple steps away from getting out of where you are if you feel like you're stuck. So I call this journey the hot mess to health success journey and it has six phases and I tried to narrow it down but I really I just think as women we're just more complicated than men and I know like I've heard other men's journeys and stuff and all these things and I just I couldn't narrow it down. So we have six. Here we are.

Speaker 1: 4:10

And the first one is it sounds a little depressing, but I'm calling it the hopeless zone and I have been there. This is the zone you're at. If you know your symptoms, you're feeling frustrated that you're never going to figure this out. You are just beating your head against the wall. You can't figure out why you can't feel better. You can't figure out why you can't lose the weight. You're scared that maybe your health is going to continue to decline. Maybe you've just had a not so great visit at your doctor and you know they told you that you need to start eating better and working out and you just feel like frightened that you're never going to be able to figure it out and your health is just going to keep getting worse. You feel exhausted all the time. You have a negative mindset about just everything and you have guilt. You're filled with tons of excuses about why you can't do things to change and you're constantly comparing yourself to others and feeling that where they are is completely unattainable for you.

Speaker 1: 5:06

The other thing that I think is a big component of this for us moms is that we start to feel like a failure as a mom, because if we're not doing the best thing for ourselves, sometimes it's maybe we're not as active, maybe we can't do some of the things with our kids that we want to do. You know, when you kind of get this negative mindset, you feel like a bad mom. You start beating yourself up more and more and you just get really extremely frustrated. So I'm calling this the hopeless zone. So if you are there right now, you're not alone. I have definitely been there.

Speaker 1: 5:35

A lot of people listening to this probably either are there or have been there and what I kind of put together as action items or a checklist of ways to kind of get out of that hopeless zone and move to phase two would be asking for help from a support or accountability partner, someone who is emotionally invested in you so a spouse, a parent, a cousin, your best friend ask them for help, right? Someone that cares about you, genuinely cares about for you. And the other things that I think you really need to do is admit to yourself that you have a problem here, like there's a problem, something's not working right, and voice it out loud to your family and to your children. And I think that part is hard, but I think it's crucial because I think when we're on a health journey and we're really struggling and we are in this hopeless zone, we really need our kids to know that you know mommy's struggling here. Like I really want to be the better mom. I really want to feel better, I want to know that I'm feeling my body properly and I want to be more active. Really, getting vulnerable is scary, but that is when we become stronger. That's when we become able to push out of our comfort zones and really get to where we want to go. So I personally think that including your children in this is one of the most important things that we can do as moms, because they're watching us and knowing that they're rooting for us, it does help. It really does.

Speaker 1: 7:12

And another thing is recognizing that this is a long-term journey and not a sprint. So there's been plenty of times in my life maybe plenty of times in yours where you've tried to lose 10 pounds for a beach vacation or lose some weight to go to your cousin's wedding in Mexico or whatever. There's tons of things that we do that for. That's a sprint right, like when we're really doing this for the long haul. We're doing this because we're invested in our overall health, our well-being, we want to set good examples for our kids. We have to acknowledge that this is a long-term journey that really never ends Like I am not at the end of my journey. I'm constantly evolving and I don't think there's ever an end date to this. I don't. So I think that recognizing that it's long, long, long, long and it's not a sprint. There's no final destination in 30 days is a mindset shift that needs to be done to be moving into phase two.

Speaker 1: 8:11

Now, phase two I'm calling the awareness zone, and basically what that means is you have. You have the acknowledgement. Right. You're aware you're desiring to get healthier, you desire to be better, but you kind of have this fear of failure that keeps you from moving forward. Maybe you have what I'm calling enjoyment FOMO, where you fear this health journey is going to keep you from missing out on all the fun stuff that's going on around you, whether it's parties or going out at night or drinking or being social, things like that. You kind of have this FOMO about that stuff that's keeping you back. You want to start, but you don't know where to start. Right Mindset to figure this out. You kind of start to have this mindset pressure that you're putting on yourself that you need to figure this out sooner or later. Maybe you're like I'm not getting any younger anymore. You know it's getting harder as I age. You're still comparing yourself, but you start to feel like, all right. Maybe you start to look at different people and you're like, all right, well, I don't need to be like this bikini model over there, but there's people that have like attainable figures, attainable health that I can now get. So you start realizing that there is attainable health out there. You know.

Speaker 1: 9:32

You're still at this point, though, where you're feeling unbalanced and unorganized because you're just in this frame of mind, like you don't know where to start. You're aware that you want to start, but you're just kind of chaotic about how that's going to happen. You don't have a plan. Okay, in order to get out of phase two, this awareness zone, and move to phase three, these are the things that I personally think need to be accomplished, and that's going to be setting goals. Determine your why, and not just your surface why, but five levels deep of what your why is Continuously asking yourself why, why, why? And really getting to the root of what your internal why is. You start finding self-motivation. You either start reading some self-help books or finding quotes. You start finding stuff that motivates you. You are willing to accept that failure is a natural part of this process. Everything is not going to go as planned. It's not always going to be a perfect scenario, and the fear of failure is what makes you stronger, and it's when you start learning what works for you and what doesn't. But you're starting to accept the fact that this is part of the process.

Speaker 1: 10:47

In order to move to the next phase, you find your health baseline. This is something that I think is so critical and often missed. But Going to the doctor, scheduling some blood work, finding a functional medicine doctor or a nutritionalist or a health coach, someone that can help guide you through this. But finding your health baseline and not just your weight. Go somewhere where you can get a body fat scan done. Go somewhere that can test your visceral fat. Go somewhere and have full labs done soup, the nuts, everything. Find out where you are. Don't just assume you know. Let's not just assume anything.

Speaker 1: 11:23

So, in order to get from this awareness zone to the next zone, I really think that you need to have health baselines established and, lastly, you need to be willing to admit that you need help outside of your main circle too. I think that's a big one as well. You need an accountability partner and sometimes although in the beginning I said I want you to confide in those people that love you that this is a journey that you really want to go on, so they will be your biggest cheerleaders. But you do need someone outside of that circle to hold you accountable, because how easy is it for me and my husband, for instance? He knows my journey that I'm on, but if I tell him that I want Ben and Jerry's, he's probably going to go get it for me, right? I need someone that's not going to let my husband like, tell my husband not to let me get the Ben and Jerry's, or whatever it is that I'm focusing on at the moment and sometimes I feel like the ones closest to you yes, they can be your cheerleaders, but they are not the best accountability partners. So, really searching outside of your immediate circle whether that's a health coach, a doctor, a nurse, a dietitian, nutritionist, whatever it is and having that accountability so that you can set your plan and you can execute on it.

Speaker 1: 12:40

Now that brings us to our third zone and that is going to be called execution zone. When you're here, you have the mindset already set let's go, let's do this. You are fully committed. You start seeing the initial weight loss. You start feeling better. You start building the confidence that you can actually do this this time. It's not going to be another one of those cycles. You are starting to achieve small milestone goals. You're starting to learn how to feel your body better and feeling more confident about the choices that you're making. You're actively moving your body more, whether that's a set routine, but you're just moving more. You're drinking more water and you're building healthy habits and you are starting to feel like the choices that you're making are setting really good examples for your kids.

Speaker 1: 13:33

So this is the execution zone. This is like, yes, let us do this. This is where I want everyone to at least be, but I know what it's like to be in those other two zones. I do, I'm just going to be there. And this is not something that you can't go back. We always can cycle through this, which is why health is a journey, right?

Speaker 1: 13:53

So, in order to get from the execution zone to the next zone, I think these are the things that have to be achieved. So we want to be achieving our milestone goals regarding fueling our body, exercise routines, proper sleep, water intake. So whatever goals we are setting for ourselves, we are hitting them continuously. We kind of like we've got that part down. We are starting to see a visual difference in ourselves. We are actively searching out ways to reduce stress. We understand that our limitations are only an excuse, that we can kind of go outside of that zone. Now we're kind of not limiting ourselves to what is possible.

Speaker 1: 14:35

And then the next zone. So the reason why, like I said, I call this a journey is because the next zone is where a lot of people can get to, and me personally. I think I'm even here in this next zone and I've gone back and forth and back and forth. But I think it's important to note this fourth zone and call it the plateau zone, because it's very common, especially as women, to kind of hit this zone. So we were all positive we're moving forward with the execution zone, we're doing the right things, but we still hit this plateau right.

Speaker 1: 15:08

So, plot season four Zone four is the plateau zone, and I think the symptoms of this how you know you're here, is you've kind of slipped back into maybe some old habits, like for me it was the whipped cream, like when that starts entering my life again, it's a slippery slope. Your weight loss has now stalled or is very slow. You start to catch yourself falling back into that negative mindset. Your journey is now starting to feel a little bit more like a burden and a little bit of less excitement, is you know, the excitement is slipping away. You start feeling like this is another failure. You start feeling like this is just another time of your journey that you failed at right.

Speaker 1: 15:52

And I think what's really critical in this zone and this is what most of the time happens to us is that there's an unforeseen hurdle or life change that causes this plateau. Right, it's a life happens moment. So when things like that happen that are unforeseen, maybe you get the flu, or maybe you have a sick kid home and you can't work and you're trying to juggle work in a sick kid, or maybe you lose a family member, maybe you're going through a divorce, maybe you lose your job All kinds of things happen in our lives, right, some more serious than others, but no matter what it is, there's just a life happens moment, and I think that is what most of the time happens. That gets people stuck in this plateau area, and I want you to know you're not alone, right, but we can get out of it. You can move yourself from this plateau zone to the next zone and really get through this moment of plateau, and this is what I think needs to happen.

Speaker 1: 16:47

So the checklist, the action items for getting out of this plateau zone and moving on your health journey to the next zone, would be reintroducing your why, really thinking about this, digging deep and, if it's, maybe it's changed from when you started and maybe you're willing to be more vulnerable and break it down. Maybe you write your why on your bathroom mirror, maybe you put it on a sticky note on your desk. But reintroducing your why because, at the core, that is what's going to keep us motivated and keep us pushing through whatever barriers come in our way. You also have to remind yourself to give yourself grace when life changes, especially when major life things happen. There might be a pause in your journey and it might be a little bit of a setback, but things are going to happen. This is life and a life with kids and being married and working. Things happen. Life is crazy and you have to be willing to give yourself grace when needed. You need to be able to reach out to your accountability partner when you need additional help and be vulnerable about it, because probably what maybe you've done in the past is not reaching out for help and in order to stay with this and stick through this, having that accountability buddy is going to be so critical.

Speaker 1: 17:58

Refocus on what was working and what's changed. So, in the instance of reintroducing whipped cream, like I do, that's what's changed. Again, it's the whipped cream, you know. So going back and saying, okay, I owe it to myself to get rid of the whipped cream. This time it's definitely not helping me, it's hurting me, it's getting me stuck. That's kind of the only thing I can see is different. It's the whipped cream. Maybe there's something in your life that you've let creep back in. That's not the healthiest habit and we need to kind of reevaluate that.

Speaker 1: 18:27

We also need to take a moment and celebrate the growth and success that you've already had, because we went through these other zones and we were in the execution zone. We started getting that initial weight loss, we started feeling better. Let's celebrate that. Maybe it's taking a spa afternoon and going getting a massage and a mani pedi and just taking that moment to acknowledge where you've come, how far you've come, and being proud of that. We never really do that enough as women, I don't think, especially as moms. We always feel guilty about it and Sometimes it's just taking that moment to say you know what? I'm not where I want to go, but I'm sure as heck further along than I was three months ago or nine months ago, whatever it is, and Taking that moment to celebrate what you've accomplished can really just help that mindset shift to bust through wherever plateaus you were on, and I also think that tracking when you have a plateau could be critical.

Speaker 1: 19:20

So it doesn't have to be writing down everything you eat every day, but just writing a journal, maybe keeping keeping note of how many hours a night you're sleeping, how much water you're drinking, how much stress you're really under on a scale from you know one to ten rate, your stress on a daily basis, you know. And if you do want to focus on nutrition again, if you think that's where you're kind of getting weak again, just writing down like what you're eating and kind of identifying the trigger foods like for me, like I said, it's whipped cream. Like when that starts entering back in it's a slippery slope and I know it, it's, it's not blind to it, I don't even need to write it down, I know. And there might be foods like that for you too, where you're like oh, here we go, it's the 20 bags of popcorn I ate in the last two weeks, totally guilty of that as well sometimes. So I get it. But we really have to acknowledge, remember, on a health journey, it's like really taking that step back and saying, okay, what am I gonna do to bust through this plateau? So those are the things I think we need to focus on to move to number five. So the fifth zone is called the breakthrough zone, and that's because we broke through this plateau, right. So we now have the mindset of let's go, like let's go, do this, let's finish this out, let's complete when we started, let's get to where we're going, let's go.

Speaker 1: 20:29

You are consistently losing weight again. You are starting to now feel like you got this. You are in control of what is happening to your body. You have learned how to make those healthy choices. You're not beating yourself up anymore. If something happens and you didn't eat according to plan, you're not beating yourself up. Things are gonna happen, right. You are gonna be starving and you might eat a slice of pizza, and that was not part of the plan. That is okay, as long as we're not beating ourselves up about it. You are, you know. You made the conscious decision to eat that and you're gonna move on. Right. We're not gonna beat ourselves up. We're prepared when things don't go as planned. Right, maybe we always keep some healthy snacks in our purse or in our car or something. We're prepared. We are fitting into clothes that you maybe have not been able to wear in a very long time.

Speaker 1: 21:16

Other people now start to notice the new confidence that you have in yourself. You really start feeling like a good mom, that you are now head-setting such good healthy examples that your kids are pointing them out. And I think that is like the pinnacle of all of this. When your kids acknowledge that Mommy is eating a salad, or mommy is eating a something that's a healthier choice, or whatever the verbage is that you want to use with your kids as far as making better choices, or Mommy's been walking so much, I want to go on a walk with mommy. You know things like that. They notice, they're always looking, they're taking it all in, and when they start acknowledging how great of a job you're doing and that maybe they want to do it, that is like so such a good feeling as a mom. You know All right, and then I think so we're on number five. Like I said, there are six zones, so what I think needs to happen to move to the last zone in this journey doesn't mean it's the end. It just means the last zone in this journey.

Speaker 1: 22:16

You are now staying consistent with the new lifestyle. You are continuously reminding yourself that this is the marathon and not the sprint, so it's not going to be over, but it's something that you're working on all the time. You are comfortable getting out of your comfort zone and I think this is a big one. So you are no longer afraid asking for help. You are no longer afraid calling your accountability partner. You are maybe challenging yourself to new fitness goals. You are just like the sky's the limit. You are no longer holding yourself back. You are achieving milestones again regarding nutrition, exercise, movement, sleep and water intake. So all these things are kind of working on all cylinders.

Speaker 1: 23:01

And, lastly, what I'm calling number six is the healthy lifestyle success zone. Now, this is the last step in the journey. Like I said, is not where this ends, but these are the kind of things that you know you want to be doing, you want to be feeling. So, when you get to this last zone, you, if not, have hit all the goals that you have for yourself. You're very close, right and you're confident that you're gonna get there. So, whether it's a clothing size, certain health markers, whether it is a weight or a body fat percentage, you're like approaching it or there.

Speaker 1: 23:37

Being healthy feels like a lifestyle now and not a chore. It's not a chore. This is your new life. You've committed to this. This is if someone said to you oh, you do this. You're like yeah, that's just what I do. You feel energized. Naturally, you do not want to go back. You have a burning desire to never want to go back to that. You just feel it in your soul that you never want to go back to feeling like how you did when you started in the hopeless zone.

Speaker 1: 24:02

You are motivated to do other things Challenges outside of your comfort zone, even more than you were in the breakthrough zone. You're like, determined to like, challenge yourself more. You are living a very active life, whatever fun activities that means for you, whether it's a fitness routine or just moving your body more. You are just a more active person. You are body confident, which, again, is something we all want. You have food freedom, which is again critical. You know how to feel your body. You know what the things are that you eat that make you feel like garbage and you don't really want to eat them a lot, and you know how to eat to feel energized. You know how to eat to like, get through the day as a busy mom and feel your body good, and you now know that you are setting, without a doubt, a good example for your kids and you feel confident about that one a thousand percent, which is again critical.

Speaker 1: 24:56

So the checklist I guess kind of how I'm gonna wrap this up in a bow To stay in this zone, which is a continuous zone. This is not the final destination, this is forever zone. Basically, you're staying consistent, you're open to new challenges that life brings. You are always focused on keeping stress and sleep a top priority in your life. You're mindful that everything that you're doing is now setting a positive example for your children. You've maintained a continuous positive mindset. You don't forget that your health and wellness is of utmost importance and you've created a new life and not a diet, and I think that that is really the pinnacle of what all of us want.

Speaker 1: 25:40

But I also wanted to know one of you guys all to know that are listening to this that these other zones, they're real right. And I do know what it's like to be hopeless with my journey and I know what it's like to be at a plateau and I know what it's like to feel that I'm at this end part, that it's kind of like this continuous journey that never ends, and I know what it's like to go backwards. I've done that I don't know how many times so in a way, just validates where you are and what you're feeling, and Hopefully some of these action steps, checklist items can help you get out of those zones and get to where you want to go. Because ultimately, if you're listening to this, I'm gonna assume that you genuinely want to get healthier. You are focused on your health. Maybe you don't know where to start, but I just want to tell you that it's worth focusing on right.

Speaker 1: 26:29

I have been on this journey, I'm still on this journey, like I've said a bunch of times, and it's always worth putting the time in. It always is, especially because my little ones are watching me right and I want to set a good example for them. I want it to be easier for them to be healthier than it was for me. You know I want my kids to grow up with certain habits and just a lifestyle that doesn't feel Hard to them like it does for me sometimes, because you know I didn't grow up with the perfect example of health. You know I didn't see my parents work out. I didn't. I had a lot of process food as a kid.

Speaker 1: 27:02

You know I'm a child of the 80s, much like most of you listening probably are, so Hopefully this journey, this hot mess, the health success journey, can help Let you know that you're not alone in this journey and no matter where you are, whatever zone you're in, you can get to where you want, and I hope that this helps give you the confidence I'm here for you. If you need accountability, I'm gonna be offering some Coaching calls soon, so, please, if I can be that person for you, I would be happy to be. I have been down this road, I've been on this journey, I'm still in this journey and I hope that this can give you comfort to know that this is. This is a journey that we are all on together as moms. Right, we all want to put our health first and I hope that this gives you the validation and how you're feeling, but also the proof that you're not going to be stuck there. You don't have to be stuck, all right.

Speaker 1: 27:56

Thank you so much for tuning in. Everyone have an amazing week. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening to this episode of hot mess mom health. If you love this episode, please leave me an iTunes review. It would mean the world to me and it would help me get the word out about helping other moms reclaim their health. Thank you so much you.