Speaker 1: 0:00

Do you postpone doing something because it's not perfect? How many times have you not done something because it's either not the right time or not the right circumstance? Have you had the thought that maybe you're the one holding yourself back due to things not turning out perfect? I'm going to share with you how I'm holding myself back in areas of my life and how I think it can help you gain control of your health today. Thank you for tuning in to the Hot Mess Mom Health Podcast, where starting messy is always better than perfect.

Speaker 1: 0:27

My name is Rebecca Santos. I'm a busy mom, just like you, trying to level up my health and reduce stress in this crazy life Since becoming obsessed with all things health and wellness. My mission here is to share information so that you can finally lose the weight you want and feel energized, because us moms all deserve to feel good. Grab that iced coffee and listen in to all the things I am learning about my perfectionism and how it can help you get healthy. Hey there, welcome to the Hot Mess Mom Health Podcast. Do you wish you could find a sustainable way to get healthy and not feel overwhelmed in the process? Do you find yourself up late at night scouring Pinterest for meal prep ideas and quick workouts. Do you wake up with big, ambitious goals only to feel stressed out and disappointed when you fall back in your old habits? Drive to the Chick-fil-A drive-thru for the second time this week, all while the fresh produce you just bought goes bad.

Speaker 1: 1:19

Hey, I'm Rebecca. I too am a working mom of two littles and self-proclaimed hot mess mom. All my life I've struggled with trying to maintain a healthy weight and feel good in my skin. I could add yo-yo dieter to my resume. After I packed on 50 plus pounds with two pregnancies, I decided to change for good. I wanted to stop obsessing about food, stay consistent and set a good, healthy example for my kids. But I kept telling myself that I didn't have the time, the energy or accountability to stay on track until I changed my mindset and created One Healthy Habit at a Time. In this podcast, you will find simple, actionable steps so you can create a healthy lifestyle and get relief from the overwhelm. Spray that dry shampoo. Grab your iced coffee, turn up the volume and let's get healthy.

Speaker 1: 2:04

Hey there, happy Monday and welcome back to another episode of Hot Mess Mom Health. Thank you for tuning in with me another week. If you have been a long-time listener, you will notice that the past maybe a month, month and a half or so have been replays, so thanks for sticking in there with me. I've been going through so much stuff at home and just with my life in general, with my kids, keeping me so busy, that unfortunately the podcast got a back burner. But I wanted to come here and be real with you guys today and share with you, kind of you know, what's going on in my life and how I think it can relate to you and your health and wellness journey, because I think there's so much we all can learn from each other and I know when I'm struggling with something that maybe someone else is struggling with it too and perhaps it could help you.

Speaker 1: 2:49

So basically, the long and short of it is I feel kind of frozen with what I want to do with my health business with the podcast, and the root core of it truly is perfectionism. Right it is. I don't know if I'm doing this right. I don't know how to create a business right. I don't know how to move forward right, because I've never done it.

Speaker 1: 3:10

So if you are in that frozen state of not being able to move forward with your health journey because you're afraid that it's not going to look like someone else's journey or it's not going to be perfect, or you're never going to have the perfect body. Well, I don't have any of those things either, but I also don't have a business that's perfect. I don't even have a business really at all, if I'm being honest, and that is something that I desire. So I feel frozen because I am stuck in this aspect of if it's not perfect, it can't be done, so I don't do anything. And I feel like a lot of people.

Speaker 1: 3:46

When you're on a health journey, maybe you've thought about things for a long time, maybe you've tried to make little steps and you just get stuck, and it's because you always are looking at someone else's journey or someone else's thing and wondering if you're not doing it perfectly and that's why you're not getting the same result. But the root of that is perfectionism, is holding us back, those thoughts of being perfect and looking at someone else's journey and what someone else has done. Is our perfectionism holding us back from creating our future and creating our best life, no matter what that is that you're looking to gain, whether it is a business, or if it's a relationship, or if it's a family life that you want or if it is losing weight and having the body and the health that you desire. We get stuck in our own heads and our own ways because it doesn't look like someone else's, like Sue down the street has been able to lose 40 pounds for years and keep it off. Why can't I? And because I've tried everything she does, it doesn't work for me. I can't do it because that's the perfect way. Well, it's not, but we think it is right. We think our perception is what other people are doing is perfect. And the reality is we don't see the behind the scenes a lot of times. How many years someone's went through a health struggle, how many years someone's tried to create a business and make it successful. We don't see those things. We see the highlight reels in people's lives for the most part, and I needed to kind of take a step back and say what do I really want out of this?

Speaker 1: 5:17

And I think for anyone out there listening, the parallel in a health and wellness journey is, you know, defining perfectionism first of all, which is something I looked up because I'm like do I have this? Like I don't even know what it is. You know, you hear the term and sometimes you're like what the hell is that? So I looked up the definition of a perfectionist and it is a person who refuses to accept any standard short of perfection, has excessively high personal standards and overly critical self-evaluations. And I was like, oh, that's definitely me, like I think that I can't get or achieve what someone else has in a business, so I just don't do anything. So that vision of perfection is holding everything I want and dream about back and it's so detrimental to all of us.

Speaker 1: 6:03

Because, you know, you see, maybe pictures of a body that you want, or you see this life that you look at and you think that's what you want and it looks perfect, but, like I said, we don't see anything that's going on behind the scenes. So I think it's a really good reminder for me and hopefully this helps someone out there listening. You know, maybe you don't have the body you want right now, maybe you don't have the energy levels you want right now, maybe you don't have the life you desire and you want those things, you dream of those things, maybe. Something you, you know we all can do, and something that I'm making a conscious effort to do, is remove anything that makes me feel like I'm comparing myself to them. So, even if you know it's a business, a health and wellness, maybe you're constantly, because you're trying to lose weight, you're constantly following people on social media that have already succeeded that weight loss journey and you're constantly flooding your reels and your stories and your mind with people that have that body that, to you, is perfect or perfection. You know, maybe for me, I'm following people that have this quote unquote perfect business, and that is truly getting in my head right. Maybe following someone that's, you know, working towards something, or maybe not following any business people, or maybe it's time to unfollow everyone that's posting about weight loss. You know, whatever is going to kind of clear your mind so that you can realize that this journey is you versus you, you becoming the better version of yourself, nobody else's version of what's perfect for you, and I think that's the point right, like we don't need to be comparing ourselves to other people, another person's vision of their perfect.

Speaker 1: 7:40

What is your version of perfect? I mean, I don't have the perfect body. I don't know anybody, even someone that you look at, that you're like that person has the best body. They probably hate their thighs. They probably hate their skin, they probably hate their hair, they probably hate something about themselves. We all are so hypercritical of ourselves and I just want to like take a deep breath right, critical of ourselves. And I just want to like take a deep breath right and refresh, restart my mindset about my business and my podcast. And what I want and what I wish for you is that you could just take this moment and say is perfectionism holding me back? Have I not made the right steps, made the right strides? Because I'm too worried about following someone else's version of perfection. Maybe for you it's literally just being able to walk 10,000 steps a day and you would just know you'd feel better. And that's your version of perfection right now. That's your version of giving yourself that time and energy out of the day that you need. That, you know, will catapult you into your health journey for the future, instead of becoming overly critical because you're not eating all the right things, you're not walking the things, you're not lifting the weights, you're not doing this stuff, you're not doing that. Maybe you're not in the right season of life for those things, and that's okay. You can still make health strides without perfection. So, at its core for me.

Speaker 1: 8:56

I'm looking to make a lot of changes with the podcast. I'm actually probably going to be changing its name to something that I feel like makes me at the core, feel like it embodies everything that I want to speak to everyone about. You know, there's things that go on where it's like okay, I'm taking a step back, and you, too, can take a step back in your life and say what have I been doing thus far that is holding me back? Why am I stuck in this perfectionism? Why am I looking at everyone else's version of perfection and comparing myself to it when I know nothing that goes on other people's lives right? We have no idea people's childhood trauma, people's struggles that they go through every day. All we see is glitz and glamour and bits and pieces of it, and it is so hard, as someone who strives type A always wants to do the best, the right thing, when you maybe feel like you're failing right Because you're not achieving the same thing that other people are doing.

Speaker 1: 9:50

So I wanted to be, you know, honest with you guys and let you know why there's been so many replay episodes. It's not because I don't love doing the podcast. I absolutely love doing this and I'm going to continue doing it and I want to help people get healthy Like I truly want to do that, and I know that getting caught in my own emotions and my own perfectionism isn't going to help anyone get healthier. So taking that step back in that time is something that I needed to do to really figure out what was going on in my mind and why I was just feeling very stuck. So if that can relate to your journey in health, I think that that can help people, because I really do believe as women, as busy moms, we're really great at putting everyone first and we're not great about putting ourselves first, our dreams, our wishes and especially our health.

Speaker 1: 10:40

And whether your dream is a business, whether your dream is to be energized throughout the day, whatever that is for you, taking that perfectionism and getting rid of it, trying your hardest to change that mindset, to look at things a little bit differently and realize your version of perfect has to compare to no one else's. All you need to do is worry about being better than you were the day before and that's it. And it can be something so small, and that's the reminder that I needed the time that I needed to take. So for you. I hope, if you need the time, take some time to yourself, sit in your thoughts, journal, meditate, do whatever you have to do to get out of those perfectionism thoughts, because they are holding you back. They are, I know, I've been through it, I've recently been through it and it's a pain in the butt, but we all do that. I think it's unfortunately how we're wired to some degree. But only we can change it right. Only we can change our thoughts.

Speaker 1: 11:32

And I really do believe that, if we can get to the core of why we're feeling those ways, it really is because we're comparing ourselves to others and it's hard. It's hard not to do it. But we have to really look at ourselves and say how can I become that best version of myself and that's all I need to worry about? That's it, because, ultimately, who cares about anybody else? Right? You need to worry about yourself, your health, your family, your wellness and doing everything you can to take care of your mental health and your physical sense and your relationships and take care of your stress. That's it, so you can be the best version of yourself. Period, the end. And I wanted to leave you guys with a little quote about perfectionism from Winston Churchill and it goes perfectionism is the enemy of progress. So kind of wraps everything I set up in a nice little bow, but I do believe it.

Speaker 1: 12:24

I hope that this podcast episode finds you well. Please look forward to a lot of changes coming good, positive changes. I am in a much better mindset and I hope that this helps you know. Recenter you, because it's not about being perfect. Messy action is always going to be better than perfect. So take this time today to recenter your thoughts. Take time, like I said, journal, meditate, whatever you have to do that works for you. Stop comparing your journey to anyone else's. Your journey is you. How can you become the best version of yourself tomorrow? Have a great week. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening to this episode of Hot Mess Mom Health. If you love this episode, please leave me an iTunes review. It would mean the world to me and it would help me get the word out about helping other moms reclaim their health. Thank you so much.